A Fairytale Wish...

Exams are round the corner, but yet this very year, there's one more challenge I will have to face. But somehow this challenge seems to already prove its results. Sometimes you never understand why one's so stubborn. You see the end result, in fact you know the end result. Yet, you still wanna put foot to change this. Why are human so adamant? Must we really be faced with the unpleasant results before we face reality? I really don't understand.

Sometimes you wonder. If you try yet you fail, is it your fault really? I don't know. I guess today I'm just so full of sentiments after watching the interview with Terry Irwin on TV. It as touching, it was like a fairytale. How nice if we could all just live in this fairytale. :)

But someone told me that if you're happy that's all that matters. Well, maybe I was and now I'm not anymore. I dunno - but I still Wonder...

No More Running Away...

hm... Have had many months or rather 2 months of great fun. But I know it's all coming to an end now. No more denial no more escape. It's time to face the real issue at hand. But what can I do? Nothing. Why can't one be in control of their own life? It's so unfair. But that's life. Hehe. We've just gotta face I suppose. Maybe another some time away in the UK for exchange next yr would do me good. Just like my little time in Lismore. Sometimes away from everything would be ideal. No more frustrations, no more responsibilities and no more baggage. Maybe that's the best way to live. At present moment I've just given up. Everything always ends up the opposite way it should be or rather different from what I wanna it to be. I'm tired. I give up.

Acceptance is Simple But Denial is the Root of All Evil...

I never understand why I always leave myself in the same old predicament. Something is seriously wrong with my life. I always end up having to solve the unsolvable mystery. Maybe it's not meant to be solved at all. That's why life is a mystery. Why does my happiness always have to be taken away from me one day?? I never understand. Is this life?? You really wonder. But what can you do?? Acceptance is easy but denial is the root of all evil. Maybe I seriously never ever learn from my mistaken. Do it once, do it twice, do it thrice and the story goes on... But the question being - Do I seriously ever learn my lesson? I guess not? Cause ultimately, it is always the same issue that makes me ponder and wonder what the next step should be. Sometimes all I wished was that "if only i knew"...